In what appears to be a failed low speed getaway, the boyfriend of dime-a-dozen reality “star” Stephanie Pratt was arrested yesterday for allegedly rolling over the foot of a police officer in Manhattan. According to earlier reports, Julien Chabbott was charged with Second Degree Assault (New York Penal Law 120.05(3)), Vehicular Assault (New York Penal Law 120.03) and Obstruction of Governmental Administration (New York Penal Law 190.50). However, it appears that only the misdemeanor crimes of Third Degree Assault and Obstruction of Governmental Administration are being prosecuted. While I am confident Manhattan District Attorney Cyrus Vance, Jr. did not envision he would be juggling cases of such magnitude upon being elected as Manhattan’s chief prosecutor, I am equally confident he and his office will get to the bottom of this allegedly bone-headed move (just accept the ticket, man!!!).
As a preliminary matter, Chabbott apparently lacks the minimum level of common sense one would expect from the average self-absobred twenty-something who can only afford a zip car. If a police officer is issuing you a ticket, don’t get in his or her face, grab the ticket from his or her hand or…wait for it…drive away as he or she is standing immediately next to or in front of your car. While stupidity is fortunately not a crime, Chabbott’s alleged charades may be. So, instead of sleeping at nearly 1:00 am, let me quickly and briefly dissect some of the potential charges.